10:31 a.m. - 2005-12-14

I haven't had much to say these days, probably because I've been busy with the baby and...well, the baby.

She rolled over for the first time on her two month birthday. It was pretty anti-climactic, really. I put her belly-down on her playmat, and she pushed real hard with her right hand, and then she was on her back. I wrote it down in the baby book and called her daddy, and she hasn't done it since.

We've bought a few Christmas gifts for Ali, but nothing for each other. The plan right now is to get a camcorder after Christmas when (hopefully) they'll go on sale. Alan's co-workers sent him home with some cologne yesterday (his birthday was the 1st), and I felt guilty for not getting him anything other than cards from me and the baby. He's told me fifteen times that I gave him the most amazing and special gift in the world (the baby, duh), but I have a feeling that's about played out.

It still doesn't feel like Christmas. The weather can't seem to make up its mind--one day we're sweating in our t-shirts, the next we're bundled up and freezing to death. My sister and I haven't spoken since before Thanksgiving, and I know it's bitchy (especially since the fight is all my fault), but I really don't care. I didn't go into all that here, and I don't intend to. Bleh.

Ali is smiling and cooing all the time now, which is about the cutest damn thing in the world, and one of the only things that make my days worthwhile. I love those big goofy baby grins more than anything in the world. Corny as it sounds, everything lights up when she smiles at me, and I absolutely can't imagine life without her.

God, I'm such a sap.

And so boring too. No wonder I haven't been writing.

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I am: so very many things. A mother, a wife, a dreamer, a lover of animals and babies, a friend. I've been called a bitch, but if that's what you call someone who stands up for what they believe in and refuses to settle, then I guess the title fits.

loves: my family, horses, a full night's sleep, puppy breath, my daughter's laughter, thunderstorms, bubble baths, makeup, soft sheets, David Sedaris and Augusten Burroughs, wine, massages, the written word, and sour straws.

dislikes: closed minds, depression, pimples, extreme heat, math, panic attacks, black licorice, doing laundry, white chocolate, gin, Bush.