Just the two of us
9:39 a.m. - 2006-02-09

Let's see. Where to start?

I've been so lazy about updating that when I got the email reminding me that my Gold membership is about to expire, I debated about whether or not to renew it. I hate the layout anyway, but I absolutely do NOT have time to go searching for a new one, let alone set all that shit up. I'd really like a personalized one, but I don't know anyone (in real life, anyway) that can do that kind of thing. And I wouldn't know who to ask anyway. I'll probably go ahead and pay for another year, if for no other reason than I've kept this up for so long that it seems a waste to just let it go. (But if anyone's REALLY bored and would like a little extra cash, I'd totally pay you to fix me something purty. I'm just sayin'.)

Alan's leaving this afternoon, and I'm bummed. The week that he's been home has flown by, and I don't know how I'm going to manage without him for another three weeks. It's been wonderful to have him here with me all day, because just having another set of hands to help with the baby makes all the difference in the world. Single working moms? You all deserve a medal and national recognition and multi-millions of dollars, because I have no idea how the hell you do it. Staying at home with her by myself is hard as hell, and the thought of having a job outside of the house is too much for me to even think about. Yeesh.

I was talking about something...oh, yes, my husband. He is so in love with Aliana, and I can't even imagine how hard it is for him to be away from her for such a long time. She didn't really know who he was when he first got home, but it only took about a day for her to remember. I hate that he's leaving again so soon. By the time he gets back she'll be just about ready to start solid foods, and will probably be sitting up (and maybe even crawling, given the rate she's progressing), and I hate for him to have to miss so many of her "firsts."

Ali's growing so fast and changing so much that I'm hard pressed to keep track of all the new things she's doing. She "talks" all the time now, little "eh" and "ooh" and "mah" (and a slew of other) noises. She'll talk to pretty much anything, her hand, the t.v., a chair...and it's so damn cute that I keep kicking myself for not having a video camera. She's rolling over too, and though she's not able to sit up by herself just yet, she can balance like a champ. She reaches for toys (and people, sometimes), and has totally got the pouting thing down. It's hilarious to watch her stick her bottom lip out and make whimpering noises when she gets mad. My little girl is going to be a total drama queen. She grins and laughs all the time now, huge, gasping belly laughs that are the most beautiful noises I've ever heard.

I need to go now...there's lots to be done before Alan leaves this evening. I'm going to make a concious effort to write more often, but I can't promise anything. It's hard enough to find time to pee or brush my teeth or take a two minute shower, let alone write an entry.

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I am: so very many things. A mother, a wife, a dreamer, a lover of animals and babies, a friend. I've been called a bitch, but if that's what you call someone who stands up for what they believe in and refuses to settle, then I guess the title fits.

loves: my family, horses, a full night's sleep, puppy breath, my daughter's laughter, thunderstorms, bubble baths, makeup, soft sheets, David Sedaris and Augusten Burroughs, wine, massages, the written word, and sour straws.

dislikes: closed minds, depression, pimples, extreme heat, math, panic attacks, black licorice, doing laundry, white chocolate, gin, Bush.