Blah, blah, blah, baby, blah, blah, blah
5:13 p.m. - 2005-04-11

It has arms! And legs! And it's very, very active! Seriously, if I could feel this baby yet it would be kicking me to death.

They couldn't find the heartbeat with the doppler (yes, I got a little nervous) and ultrasound was ordered. Just as I was about to pull down my pants the nurse told me that we'd be doing it on my belly this time, so I was thrilled about that. No more magic wands being stuck up my hoo-hah is a just fine as far as I'm concerned. I've heard that it's easier for them to see the baby if your bladder is full, but it didn't seem to make a difference with me.

My nerves were calmed when the she told me that the heart rate was excellent (160 bpm). The little dumpling must have still been pissed off from the doctor's attempts to gouge a hole in my stomach with the doppler (seriously, he pushed SO hard that I thought he might break skin) because it was moving around like crazy. It's changed position from last time, and was kicking both feet straight out, stretching its arms, and seemed to be trying its damndest to flip over. I've never seen anything cuter in my entire life. I lay there with a goofy grin on my face and my mouth agape the whole time. It was hard to keep from laughing, but I tried my hardest not to, because every time I moved the screen went all blurry.

The frequent visits seem to be over for now, because my doctor scheduled the next visit a month from now. He also told me that I needed to decide whether or not I wanted the Triple Screen for spina bifida, Down's Syndrome, and other brain defects. After hearing his explanation of the test (high number of false positives, the only way to determine accuracy is with an amniocentisis, etc.) I've decided that I don't want to have it done. For one thing, if there's a problem other than Down's, they'll be able to tell with the ultrasound. For another, if it IS Down's, there's not a damn thing that I can do about it except worry, and I don't want to spend the next six months freaking out. If anyone has any differing opinions, or if I don't seem to have my facts straight, please share. I'm trying to make an informed decision, and that's not exactly the easiest thing to do with my doctor.

Speaking of the uncommunicative doc, I also changed my physician today. Next time I'll be seeing another doctor in the same office, and he came very highly recommended from a girl that I work with. I hope that I like him...the past six weeks haven't been as enjoyable as I'd have liked, primarily because I don't get on well with the guy that's taking care of me and my baby.

And thus concludes the baby talk for today. Like it or not, I seem to have become one of those women who can't keep her mouth shut about her kid. *sigh*

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I am: so very many things. A mother, a wife, a dreamer, a lover of animals and babies, a friend. I've been called a bitch, but if that's what you call someone who stands up for what they believe in and refuses to settle, then I guess the title fits.

loves: my family, horses, a full night's sleep, puppy breath, my daughter's laughter, thunderstorms, bubble baths, makeup, soft sheets, David Sedaris and Augusten Burroughs, wine, massages, the written word, and sour straws.

dislikes: closed minds, depression, pimples, extreme heat, math, panic attacks, black licorice, doing laundry, white chocolate, gin, Bush.

feeling:
hopeful